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Good Cop
There was a middle aged guy who bought a brand new Mercedes convertible SLK. He took off down the road, flooring it up to 95 mph and enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head. "This is great," he thought and floored it some more. He looked in his rearview mirror and there was a Florida Highway Patrol Trooper behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blasting. "I can get away from him with no problem" thought the man and he floored it some more and flew down the road at over 135 mph.
Then he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this kind of thing" and pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the State Trooper to catch up with him. The Trooper pulled in behind the Mercedes and walked up to the man.
"Sir," he said, looking at his watch. "My shift ends in 30 minutes and today is my birthday, so I'm in a pretty good mood. Considering that you stopped for me, if you can give me a reason why you were speeding, that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."
The man looked back at the Trooper and said, "Last week my wife ran off with a State Trooper and I thought you were bringing her back."
The State Trooper said, "Have a nice day."